For a fit and healthy body, you would improve your diet, get enough sleep, and follow a workout program. To start a business, you would study the market, develop your business plan, and look to raise funds. 

However, the one common ingredient that will raise your chances of achieving your goals in every area of your life and make your journey more enjoyable is a positive mental attitude. 

Regardless of the obstacles you might face on your way, your attitude can be your shield to protect you from giving in along the way.

In this article, you will learn:

• What a positive mental attitude is
• Why it is important to have a positive mental attitude
• How to develop a positive mindset
• How to fast forward to installing your positive mental attitude

What Is A Positive Mental Attitude?

A positive mental attitude is a mindset where you focus on viewing the upside in all situations. It encourages you to think of solutions when facing a problem rather than feeling discouraged.

This concept was first developed in 1937 by Napoleon Hill. In his book “Think and Grow Rich” he established that harnessing a positive mental attitude is one of the essential keys to success. 

People who adopt a positive mental attitude are continuously looking for ways to reach their goals and can usually achieve favorable results.

However, don’t mistake this concept for toxic positivity—where you would deny your negative emotions in a difficult situation and pretend to be happy all the time.

People who adopt a positive mental attitude acknowledge their negative emotions along with the positive ones. The key difference, however, is that they consciously choose to focus on the upside of difficult situations. Going by the proverb, “Every cloud has a silver lining.”

Why Is It Important To Have A Positive Mindset?

A positive mental attitude has benefits on both mental and physical levels. Here are two of the major benefits of having a positive mental attitude.

1. Better resilience

Adopting a positive mental attitude teaches you to better handle any challenge that might appear on your way. It pushes you to advance in spite of the adversities. 

Having a positive outlook, you would continuously be looking for the solutions and the learnings in any given situation.

2. Increased immunity

Your immune system is one of the things that can be influenced by your state of mind. 

A study was conducted to compare two groups of people; positive optimistic thinkers and pessimistic thinkers. The findings showed that the group that had a positive attitude had a stronger immune response. 

How To Develop A Positive Mental Attitude With Six Powerful Practices 

The first and most important thing to know about having a positive mental attitude is that it is completely up to you to decide whether you want to adopt it or not.

Your attitude is how you choose to react to people and events around you. It has nothing to do with anything external to you.

Here, we put together six powerful practices that will help you become more positive.

1. Know the power of your words

If you pay close attention, you can differentiate between a positive person and a negative person from their choice of words. 

Someone who is often using words such as, “I can’t,” “This is a disaster,” “It’s impossible” is probably someone who does not really have a positive attitude.  

You might think, “These are just words,” but in fact, the words you say have an enormous effect on your life.  

Marisa Peer, a world-renowned expert therapist, shares her expertise on the rules of the mind and states: “Your every thought and word form a blueprint that your mind and body work to make your reality.”

Regardless of whether they are positive or negative, the things you say will manifest in your life sooner or later.  

Take advantage of this knowledge starting today by consciously choosing to minimize negative words in your speech.

Ask your friends to remind you when they hear you using negative and discouraging words.

Instead, make it a point to use strong, positive words often during your day. 

Make a list of empowering words and phrases—the way you want to be or feel. Practice using them in your everyday life. Make these words and phrases become natural to you.

Here are a few examples of powerful positive phrases you can adopt:

• “I am capable of overcoming any challenge that comes my way.”
• “Today, I am brimming with energy and overflowing with joy.”
• “My body is healthy, strong, and intelligent.”

2. Learn from the adversities  

Staying positive might feel natural when you are having a good day—when you are in a great mood and everything is going your way without you even trying. 

However, you might wonder how someone can be positive when facing a challenging situation. For example, if you received bad news, made a loss in your business, or had a fight with your spouse. 

The answer is, always look for the silver lining and make the best out of any situation you find yourself in. 

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”― Dr. Wayne Dyer

What might seem to you to be a crisis, can be a necessary redirection of the course of events.

For example, instead of thinking of your business loss as a catastrophe, think of it as a lesson. Untangle the problem and try to understand what went wrong and how can you do things differently next time.

A good place to start practicing changing your perspective and thinking positively is in daily situations that would usually set you off. 

For example, think of the time you spend waiting in traffic as a chance to relax and enjoy music on your way to work. If you get sick and you can’t go to work, think of it as taking time off and resting your body so that you go back stronger.  

3. Love yourself

Self-love is important and fundamental to cultivating a positive mental attitude. The easiest way to know if you are loving yourself is by noticing what you say to yourself all the time—your inner dialogue.

Like we mentioned earlier: the words we say matter—especially the ones we say in our heads.

“The words you hear shape you, but the most important words you hear in your entire life are the words you say to yourself.”—Marisa Peer

If you pay attention to your inner dialogue and find that you tend to harshly criticize and doubt yourself, know that that is the voice of your inner critic. 

The inner critic is a voice that seeks to draw your attention to your flaws and puts you down. It would tell you things such as, “You are not smart enough to do this,” “You don’t know what you’re doing,” “You are not competent enough to get that promotion.”

You might think, “Why would anyone do that to themselves?” The truth is, this voice is not your voice. Your inner critic is a voice that you adopted based on a negative experience that caused you emotional distress. 

Unfortunately, because of the emotional reaction you had to the experience and the constant repetition of the idea in your head, the voice turns into a belief. In fact, a limiting belief, because it is hindering you from progressing in life and attaining the things you want.

The good news is that you can talk back to your inner critic, and you can tell your mind what you choose to believe instead. 

“What you present to your mind, your mind will present back to you.”—Marisa Peer

How to be kinder to yourself

Now that you understand how this voice came about, you can use the same method to consciously create your positive empowering and loving beliefs.

When you catch yourself saying discouraging statements to yourself, recognize that this is your inner critic and change the inner dialogue to a positive, encouraging one. 

You can say things such as, “I might have never done this before, but I will try,” “I am good enough,” and, “I can overcome any challenge that comes my way.”

4. Be grateful 

Gratitude not only strengthens your immune system and lowers stress levels, it also helps you to have a positive mindset.

Practicing gratitude teaches you to focus on the positive things in your life. 

Try listing three things that you are grateful for every evening. It could be something as simple as having a bed to sleep on or having hot water in your shower in the morning.

Another exercise that will help you strengthen your gratitude muscle is to find things to appreciate throughout your day. 

When something good happens during your day, no matter how small, take a moment to acknowledge it and remind yourself to be grateful for it. 

Take any small positive incident that crosses your path as an opportunity to let positivity fill your moment. It could be as simple as finding a free parking spot right in front of the door of your destination. Or accidentally finding a five-dollar bill on the floor.

If you’re thinking:

 “What if nothing is going my way right now? I can’t think of anything to be grateful for.”

That is a good reason for you to start practicing gratitude; because you may be unknowingly taking things for granted. 

Rest assured, if you give your practice of gratitude a little nudge, you will find that there is plenty to be grateful for.

5. Practice mindfulness

Given the busy and fast-paced lives we live, it is difficult to be aware of the many thoughts that go through our minds throughout the day. 

However, in practicing mindfulness, you learn to separate yourself from your thoughts. 

As a result, you become better at catching negative ideas when they pop up. Then you can consciously choose to shift your focus away from negativity and towards what is positive. 

One way of practicing mindfulness is through meditation. Marisa Peer, celebrity therapist and the founder of Rapid Transformation Therapy®, has created a free powerful meditation that you can try now. 

Another way to practice mindfulness is by trying to solely focus on one single task at any given time. For example, eating, walking, or speaking with somebody. Be present and try to give the moment your complete attention and full awareness.

Use your senses to connect to the present moment by asking yourself any of these questions:

• What am I hearing right now? 

Someone talking, a song on the radio, street noise, etc… 

• What am I seeing?

The window, my computer, a table, a sign, etc…

• What/How am I feeling?

Cold, warm, perhaps even uncomfortable in my seat, etc…

• What am I smelling?

My perfume, the soap on my hands, the flowers in the room, etc…

• What am I tasting?

Tea, coffee, a fruit, the snack I just ate, etc…

6. Surround yourself with positive people 

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”— Jim Rohn

We are all influenced—positively or negatively—by our friends and the people we spend most of our time with. Therefore, it is essential to surround yourself with friends who will support your goal of embracing a positive mental attitude.

When you are having a conversation or sharing your thoughts with positive people, they will probably respond by sharing their positive thoughts and perspectives. This can help you reaffirm your positive mental attitude.

In addition, if you were facing a difficult situation and were at risk of being dragged down by negative thoughts, positive people around you could help lift you up and get you back on track.

Surrounding yourself with positive people creates an encouraging environment for you to exercise all the practices shared previously. 

So, list the people you spend most of your time with, and try to assess the influence each one has on you.

Avoid people who put you down, whine and complain all the time, and always find something negative to point out in every story.

Instead, seek out people who show positivity in their speech and actions. 

Fast Forward To Your Positive Mindset

By now, you should have a good idea of the practices that will shift your mental attitude to a more positive one. 

After adopting these practices for some time, you will gradually begin to feel the change in your attitude and be well on your way to achieving the success you always wanted. 

There is a faster and shorter route to changing your attitude and reaping the benefits of adopting a positive mental attitude. 

From her extended three-decade experience as a therapist, Marisa Peer has created a fast and effective way to help people shift their beliefs and mindsets through self-hypnosis audio programs. 

Everything we do, including the way we behave, is a direct output of our beliefs. This is true whether we are conscious of the belief or not. 

Marisa’s hypnosis audios are designed to change the conscious and subconscious limiting beliefs that are weighing you down so you can thrive and flourish.

In Marisa’s Hypnosis Abundance Bundle, she includes hypnosis audios to cover the three most important areas to help you be more positive and live the life you want. 

You can boost your confidence and self-esteem, feel more lovable than you ever did, and attract and keep wealth.

Listening to the hypnosis audios in the Abundance Bundle will attract limitless abundance into your life.

Dissolve all the negative beliefs in your mind now and see the world in a new light.

You can also consider listening to a podcast. Why not check out Marisa Peer’s Top Ten list for self-help podcasts, and find something great to settle in to listen to.

An inspiration to so many, this media executive, actress, talk show host, television producer and philanthropist has been ‘ranked the greatest black philanthropist in American history’, plus one of the most powerful and influential women in the world.

However, Oprah’s life and journey to stardom was far from an easy one. Oprah is an example of how often the strongest people go through the most difficult times, yet it’s how they deal with it that makes them who they are.

“An Extraordinary person who lived through hell”

David Letterman described Oprah as “An extraordinary person who lived through hell,” yet despite the struggle, abuse and pain, she prevailed, standing strong and brave. What’s more, Oprah isn’t afraid to own who she is and share what she’s been through in order to become who she is today. She speaks her truth and empowers countless other people to do the same. This is why her story inspires millions across the world and makes her so relatable.

Oprah is a real-life example of what can be overcome in order to become what you know you are capable of being: A true inspiration.

A difficult start to life

Oprah was born in 1954 into rural poverty in Mississippi. Her teenage, single mother left Oprah shortly after her birth looking for work as a house maid. Oprah lived with her grandmother for the first six years of her life, who she says was very strict. It has been reported that during this time, she was so poor that she did not have shoes and often wore dresses made of potato sacks.

According to the Irish Examiner, when she appeared at Ball State University, Indiana, Oprah shared how her grandma used to beat her so hard she would bleed:

“She whipped me so badly that I had welts on my back and the welts would bleed. And then when I put on my Sunday dress, I was bleeding from the welts. And then she was very upset with me because I got blood on the dress. So then I got another whipping for getting blood on the dress…. Anybody who has been verbally abused or physically abused will spend a great deal of their life rebuilding their esteem,” Winfrey said.

Despite this, Oprah looks for the positive aspects in her life and shared how, thanks to this start in life, she learnt to read before she was three and loved to recite and give speeches at Church.

An upheaval to everything she had ever known

When she was six, little Oprah was sent north to live with her mother and half brothers in a poor and dangerous Milwaukee ghetto, which was a very different lifestyle to what she was used to on the rural farm.  Her mother was busy and often not around, so Oprah was often left alone with other family members. According to reports the household was busy and little Oprah was even made to sleep on the porch.

Oprah bravely spoke out about the child sexual abuse she endured for years. “I was raped at nine years old by a cousin, then again by another family member, and another family member.” She openly shared her experience to help other women who had been through similar experiences, to know that they are not alone and that it is ok to talk about it to process it.

Life changed when life was lost

Oprah moved to live with her father at 14, but was hiding a big secret – she was pregnant. She said that she tried to hide the pregnancy as she felt “pain and shame.” Sadly her baby was born prematurely and died shortly after birth. Oprah saw this painful time as a reminder of how precious life is and vowed to do all she could with her life.

Turning things around

“My father turned my life around by insisting that I be more than I was,” she said in an interview with Good Housekeeping magazine in 1991. “His love of learning showed me the way… Books showed me there were possibilities in life… Reading gave me hope. For me it was the open door.”

Winfrey has said that her strict father saved her life, providing her with guidance, structure, rules, and books. He required his daughter to complete weekly book reports, and she had to learn five new vocabulary words each day, otherwise she went without dinner.

School rules

Oprah became an excellent student and flourished at school. She was elected to be the school president and an active part of the drama club, debate club, public speaking classes and the student council.

Oprah won a full scholarship to Tennessee State University as a result of a speaking contest and was even invited to a White House Conference on Youth.

During her freshman year at Tennessee State, Winfrey as crowned Miss Black Nashville and Miss Tennessee. The Nashville Columbia Broadcasting System (CBS) affiliate offered her a job, which Winfrey turned down twice.

However, her speech teacher encouraged her to go for it saying that job offers from CBS were “the reason people go to college.” By 19 Oprah dropped out of her degree to become the youngest and the first black female news anchor at Nashville’s WLAC-TV.

Achieving phenomenal success despite circumstances

Oprah has worked hard to achieve phenomenal success despite her circumstances. She is an amazing example of how mindset and motivation can help you overcome anything. As Celebrity therapist Marisa Peer shares, we cannot change what happens to us, but we can change the meaning we attach to it. It is the stories we tell ourselves and the movies we play out in our mind that influences our sense of self, worth and the world around us.

“The mind has the most powerful potential on the planet” says Marisa Peer. In her Rules of the Mind article, Marisa explains that “every thought you think causes a physical reaction and an emotional response within you. First, you make your beliefs and then your beliefs make you.”

Looking for the positives

During her appearance at Ball State University, Oprah managed to convey a positive attitude to her experiences and was even thankful, she said, for everything that happened.

“I would take nothing from my journey… Everybody’s looking for the same thing, that sense of ‘was I okay?’ That means, do you hear me and is what I’m saying important to you.’ Everyone is looking for that validation. I know what it feels like to not be wanted… you can use it as a stepping stone to build great empathy for people.”

Real life stories of inspiration and transformation

If you relate to anything covered in this story and would like some useful tools and techniques to implement in your life, please read: Real Life Stories: Overcoming PTSD.

This article on Stress Management is also a useful resource. Marisa shares how “Any traumatic experience can form deep-rooted beliefs that affect our behaviour on a subconscious level. Rapid Transformational Therapy helps people understand and transform the underlying issues, freeing people from any limiting beliefs, reprogramming the mind for success. Learning stress management techniques can benefit all areas of your life.”

Rapid Transformational Therapy is Marisa’s revolutionary approach to therapy. In this process, a client explores the role, purpose, function and intention of any issue to help them understand the underlying cause, begin to overcome it and set their mind up for success.

If you would like more information please visit Rapid Transformational Therapy where you can download lots more free resources, masterclasses, and relaxing transformative audios.

What’s your story?

Oprah concludes that “Everybody has a story and your story is equally as valuable and important as my story. My story just helped define and shape me, as does everybody’s story.”

If you have a story to share…

We love to hear your real-life stories of how RTT has impacted you or your clients’ lives. If you would like to share your experience with the wider community, so as many people can benefit as possible, please email kirstin.west@marisapeer.com.

Simplicity is the act or quality of being simple – or simply being. It has been said that when asking how to live a happy life – the answer is to keep it simple.

Simplicity means different things to different people and perhaps ironically there is not a single ‘simple’ definition. According to the Collins English Dictionary, ‘The simplicity of something is the fact that it is not complicated and can be understood or done easily.’ The Cambridge Dictionary defines it as ‘the quality of being easy to understand or do.’ Merriam Webster defines it as ‘the state of being simple, uncomplicated, or uncompounded.’

If you could enjoy a day of simplicity what would you do?

• Disconnect from technology, the constant pressures of daily life and the never-ending ‘to do’ list?
• Reconnect with yourself and with nature. Meditate or do some yoga?
• Get creative writing, painting or making music? Explore your inner purpose and passions?

Sound good? Well, now there’s a whole day dedicated to doing just that – National Simplicity Day…

National Simplicity Day – 12 July.

12 July is National Simplicity Day – a day to kick back, relax and step away from all the stress and overwhelm of modern life. It is a day for reconnecting with what matters most and gathering your thoughts and observations of the world.

Why this date for National Simplicity Day?

July 12th was chosen as National Simplicity Day in honor of Henry David Thoreau, who was born on July 12, 1817, in Concord, Massachusetts. A famous philosopher, naturalist, and writer who believed in living simply. Thoreau is best known for his book Walden, a reflection upon simple living in natural surroundings. It is thought that simple living really can help us live a happy life.

How can a day of simplicity improve your life?

According to Awareness Days: ‘In the complicated world that we inhabit today where mobile phones, laptops and other modern day gadgets mean that we very rarely experience true peace and quiet to gather our thoughts, what better excuse to leave the technology at home and experience the feeling of truly being in the moment.’

Care UK state ‘So much of our time is taken up every day with jobs, school, workouts, childcare and not to mention all the tasks that need doing when we get home. Add to that, 8 hours and 41 minutes of digital activity, and it’s no wonder so many of us feel overwhelmed.

“I don’t spend that long at a screen?!” – you say

According to a report from communications regulator Ofcom (March 2014), the average UK adult does spend that long each and every day

glued to some sort of screen. We all wish for more time, but will gladly waste hours of it on digital activities. Imagine what you could do with an extra 8 hours and 41 minutes to play with every day…’

The amount of time we spend on devices is increasing at an alarming rate. We may be more connected to technology than ever before, but is this actually creating more disconnect and loneliness than ever before?

Are we facing a disconnection epidemic?

Marisa Peer, Founder of Rapid Transformational Therapy, says: “There is an epidemic in our midsts that is causing great harm in our lives, relationships, mental health and ability to connect and feel truly fulfilled.

As humans, we are naturally social creatures. We need to feel a sense of belonging, that we are connected to others. Remove this connection and researchers have shown that loneliness and rejection activate the same parts of the brain as physical pain.

The Disconnection Epidemic is much more serious than anyone could have anticipated, but together we can start taking steps in the right direction – towards happier more fulfilling lives.

I want our children to grow up in a world where they feel connected, where they are happy and fulfilled within themselves. The only way that we can make that happen is by first recognizing and healing this disconnection within ourselves.

Change happens when people work together. It’s time to stand strong, there has never been a more necessary time to stand together for happier and healthier lives.”

This insightful webinar by Marisa Peer has more information about the disconnection epidemic and how to fix it with world-leading techniques on how to live a happy life.

“You might think that disconnection doesn’t affect you, but it does. It will affect your children, parents, friends, colleagues and the people that matter in your life. I have dedicated my life to helping others master the power of their mind and I want to help you do the same. We can show others how to be connected, by connecting ourselves.

When you feel empty inside you look for things to fill that emptiness – food, alcohol, drugs, or addictive online activity.  However, the only thing that can really fill the emptiness is a connection to people, meaning and purpose.” Marisa shares her experience from being a world-class therapist for over thirty-five years, working with royalty, rockstars, Olympic athletes, world leaders, and global icons. She now shares these life-changing methods with others, so as many people as possible can benefit.

You are enough

Marisa famously started the empowering movement of I Am Enough – Mark Your Mirror to Change Your Life. She shares powerful exercises anyone can do for free, that will have dramatic results. For example, she says:

“You may not believe this, but you matter. You are here for a purpose. You have something of immense value to offer the world, that’s why you are here. When you find out what that is, you live your life with meaning, purpose, and significance. You wake up every day and think these thoughts:

• I matter
• I have a purpose
• I am significant
• I am here for a reason
• I AM ENOUGH

People should not be lonely, alone, broken and vulnerable. It’s not necessary when there is a way back. We are all here for a reason.

Success is not about money, success is about fulfilment. 

We’re all taught at such an early age that success makes us happy, that chasing the dollar makes us complete. It’s good to be successful, but not if it’s affecting your mental and emotional health.  What makes you happy is your connection to other people.​

You don’t need to ‘pay the price’ of success by becoming disconnected from who you are and what matters most to you. You can have it all – all at the same time – if you know how to get more connection and no more rejection.”

How to live a happy life – keep it simple.

Marisa has dedicated her career to simplifying the complexities of the human mind, to make life-changing value easily accessible and of benefit to as many people as possible. Marisa now teaches her methods to help people understand how the most beneficial principles of science, medical research, and leading therapy can be used to rapidly transform lives.

In Marisa Peer’s Rules Of The Mind she says “When I was training to be a therapist, I was challenged when I was told, “The mind is really complicated and very complex. It takes a lifetime to understand and to master.” I immediately thought, Well, how is that going to work then? No one has got a lifetime to master their mind. What’s the point of being 80 years old before you can finally work out your mind?

I don’t know about you, but I’m much more interested in getting results. I have spent over thirty years studying the mind, applying leading principles with thousands of clients, and now I share what I have learnt so that everyone can benefit from it. Understanding how your mind works and applying these mind hacks will enable you to achieve lasting transformational change in your life…

I believe that your mind can give you almost anything you desire if you first learn how to understand and dialogue with it. That’s why I developed Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT), to help people achieve freedom from almost any issue and make life-changing transformational tools available to everyone.

Mastering your mind doesn’t require a lifetime. I will share my many years of experience with you, as I do with all my graduates, in this special Masterclass. I hope you enjoy learning how to master your mind for permanent all-pervasive success.”

Now, I have this sense of fulfillment when I do listen to my body and give it what it needs―a healthy diet, regular exercise, meditation, enough sleep, and the confidence to turn down social events if I know that my health will suffer from overdoing it.

This article is going to look at what self-care means, how important it is, and show you 8 easy self care ideas that you can apply.

What Does Self-Care Mean?

In my opinion, self-care is the act of listening to your body and giving it love and gratitude―this also includes your mind. A blog post by Dr. Bruce Warner on the NHS website describes the act of self-care as the following:

‘Self-care is about keeping fit and healthy, understanding when you can look after yourself, when a pharmacist can help, and when to get advice from your GP or another health professional. If you have a long-term condition, self-care is about understanding that condition and how to live with it.

Applying self care ideas is recommended when you have a minor condition, which doesn’t normally need medical care (from a doctor or nurse) or any treatment in order to get better.

In practice, this means a person decides that they can manage their illness without seeing a doctor.

This may be because they don’t like taking remedies or pills, or because they believe they will recover just as quickly if they stay at home and rest until their illness goes away of its own accord. Or they may pop out to buy medicines over the counter at a pharmacy. Either way, ‘self-care’ is something millions of us do every day―for positive and practical reasons.

These are the common conditions that I suggest people can often manage for themselves:

• Coughs and colds
• Sprains and strains
• Sore throat
• Sinusitis
• Earache
• Constipation
• Headache

This explanation by Dr. Warner doesn’t include the importance of self-care for the mind and psyche, and instead focuses on self care ideas as the physical activity when you feel unwell. The Self Care Forum website has a similar outlook and defines self-care as the following:

‘The actions that individuals take for themselves, on behalf of and with others in order to develop, protect, maintain and improve their health, wellbeing or wellness.’

Delving deeper into the link between self-care and the mind, Forbes.com states an interesting take:

‘No matter how indulgent or fancy the term may sound, self care ideas are crucial for our physical, emotional and mental well-being. You shouldn’t neglect self-care and here’s why.

Why You Shouldn’t Neglect Self Care Ideas

Know Your Worth

Self-care is important to maintain a healthy relationship with yourself as it produces positive feelings and boosts your confidence and self-esteem. Also, self-care is necessary to remind yourself and others that you and your needs are important too.

A Healthy Work-Life Balance

Contrary to common belief, workaholism is not a virtue. Overworking, and the accompanying stress and exhaustion, can make you less productive, disorganized and emotionally depleted. It can also lead to all sorts of health problems, from anxiety and depression to insomnia and heart diseases. Professional self-care habits like taking intermittent breaks (for lunch, calling your mom, or taking a stroll), setting professional boundaries, avoiding overextending, etc. ensures that you stay sharp, motivated and healthy.

Stress Management

While a little dose of stress is a healthy way to give us a nudge that we need to meet the deadlines or finish that overdue task, constant stress and anxiety can have an adverse effect on your mental and physical health. Smart self care ideas like eating healthy, connecting with a loved one or, practicing meditation cuts down the toxic effects of stress by improving your mood and boosting your energy and confidence levels.

Start Living, Stop Existing

Life is a precious gift. So why waste it when we have the choice to have a more meaningful existence? Yes, you have a lot of responsibilities—fixing the dryer, mowing the lawn, paying bills. But it’s important to remember that taking care of yourself is also your responsibility. Little things like sipping tea while looking at the raindrops racing down the window glass, enjoying a bubble bath, or reading a book are essential for your daily happiness. While things, like taking up a new hobby or learning a new language, can make your life more purposeful by giving you a new reason to get up in the morning.

Better physical health: Self care ideas are not just about your mental health. It’s also about caring for your physical self, by eating healthy, taking adequate sleep, caring about your hygiene, exercising regularly, etc.’

Self-Care Is Not Selfish

This in-depth look at self-care from all angles is something that I agree with; I think it’s so important to live and not just exist. I always try to look at the bigger picture when I’m stressed out from a task at work, or I’m having a disagreement with my partner. I step back and think, does this really matter? Life will go on after this, and I’m going to be fine. Sometimes, the act of self-care can be interpreted as being selfish. I often feel guilty if I turn down a social event or say no to someone for my own good. An article on the Good Housekeeping website addresses this and explains the following:

‘First of all, it ain’t selfish. Not one little bit.

I never thought of myself as a morning person. Hitting snooze on my iPhone alarm three times each day only left me rushing off to the office feeling groggy and so not ready to talk to anyone until I could down several cups of coffee.

But starting last year, waking up earlier completely changed my A.M. routine for the better. Doing my workouts in the mornings gave me more energy — and actual motivation to get out from under the covers. Now I look forward to my pre-work HIIT class or a park run because it’s one hour I have all to myself before the emails and errands inevitably creep in.

Setting aside that time helps me feel more awake and ready to take on the day. It’s my form of self-care—and we could all use more of it, especially since we’re feeling just as anxious than ever.

Almost half of us —45% to be exact— report lying awake at night due to stress, according to a 2018 American Psychological Association survey. But that shared sense of helplessness has grown alongside another phenomenon: self-care.

“Self-care is one’s action around our physical, emotional, relational, perhaps professional, educational, and, for some people, spiritual well-being that reflects the way that we take care of ourselves on the most fundamental levels,” says Helen L. Coons, PhD, a clinical health psychologist at the specializing in women’s behavioral health and wellness at the University of Colorado School of Medicine Department of Psychiatry in Aurora, Colorado.

It’s also helpful to know what self-care isn’t. “Many women confuse self-care with being selfish—that somehow taking care of ourselves is self-involvement or a selfish act instead of a self-respectful act,” she adds. “When women take care of themselves in all aspects of their lives, they actually have more energy, more reserve and depth to take care of others at home, at work, and in their community.”

It’s all about making small and purposeful efforts—and not necessarily doing things alone. Self care ideas can look like blocking out time for a date with a partner, or planning healthy meals instead of reaching for sugary snacks. Setting those intentions can provide more motivation and pleasure and cut back on stress, worry, and for some people, irritability.’

The Importance of Loving Yourself

Caroline Picard’s words on Good Housekeeping are something that I’m an advocate of. I also support Marisa Peer’s outlook on self-care and the importance of loving myself. Marisa Peer is a world-renowned speaker, therapist, and best-selling author with over three decades of experience, she uses her experiences treating patients including rock stars, CEOs, elite Olympic athletes, royalty and Oscar-winning actors to inform her life-changing speeches and lectures.

In a previous blog post, ‘Self-Love – Learn to Love Yourself’, Marisa explains the importance of loving yourself and how it can transform your life:

“The interesting thing about love is that people can only love you as much as you love yourself. When you know your self-worth, everyone else will know it too. Find out how repeating statements such as ‘I am enough’, ‘I matter’, and ‘I am lovable’ can reinforce your positive empowering beliefs to literally transform your life.

Self-love is an unshakable belief in the worthiness of one’s self. With it, I truly believe you can do anything. Without it, you may always feel that you are not quite good enough, no matter what your accomplishments are or how many other people value you. Without self-love, you may be subconsciously sabotaging yourself, suffering disconnection to what matters most in life.

When you learn to love yourself, you have a lifelong romance that never fades, tires or disappoints you, love is always available to you no matter what.”

8 Self  Care Ideas

In summary of what I have shared in this article, I’d like to show you the following list of eight easy ways that you can start applying self-care, today:

1.  Try Breathing Exercises

Whenever I’m feeling a bit anxious, stressed out or uptight, I focus on my breathing to make me feel grounded.

• Find somewhere quiet and comfortable. Close your eyes and begin deep breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth
• Try inhaling as deeply as you can for six seconds and then exhale for six seconds
• Do this for a few minutes or until you feel that your mood is lifting and your mind is clearing.

2.  Increase Your Water Intake

I like to aim for 1.5 liters of filtered water a day. It helps my digestion, keeps my skin moisturized and stops me from overeating. I also like to add fresh herbs, like mint or rosemary to my water for added flavor. Medical News Today says that fresh mint leaves ‘has one of the highest antioxidant capacities of any food.’ It also states that rosemary ‘has been hailed since ancient times for its medicinal properties. Rosemary was traditionally used to help alleviate muscle pain, improve memory, boost the immune and circulatory system, and promote hair growth.’

3.  Focus On Getting A Good Night’s Sleep Every Night

The amount and quality of the sleep I get has a huge impact on how I perform the next day. I like to aim for 7 and a half hours each night. You can read more about insomnia sleep symptoms here.

4.  Exercise

We are all aware of the health benefits that exercise has on our bodies. Although I have days where I really don’t feel like going to the gym, once I go, I always enjoy it and can honestly say that I never feel worse after a workout, only better. However, if you don’t like gyms or don’t want to spend money on expensive memberships then this article on No-Gym Workout Methods To Get in Shape could be of interest. You can also read more about the benefits of regular exercise on the Mayo Clinic website.

5.  Keep A Journal Or Diary

It doesn’t have to be great in length, but just writing down things that you’re grateful for or have enjoyed can really help you realize your sense of self-worth. I also have a vision board saved as my screensaver on my laptop to remind me of what I’m working towards.

6.  Make Time To Read And Educate Yourself

I always feel proud when I have learned something new and I enjoy educating myself on topics that interest me. It’s great for quiz games or creating conversation at events!

7.  Eat Well

I have a history of IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and I find that eating a healthy diet, plus applying self-care really helps to control my symptoms. The bacteria in your gut affects the health of your brain and vice versa. As the two are so dependent on each other, it’s important to address both your diet and the thoughts in your mind. You can read more about the foods that Marisa rates and hates, here.

8.  Have The Confidence To Say “No” To People

Learning to say no was a hard task for me. I always felt obligated to say yes when someone asked for my time. However, if you’re already overworked and busy juggling many different errands, saying yes can lead to anxiety and ill health. Once you learn how to politely say no, you’ll feel more empowered, and you’ll have more time for your self-care, which is the most important thing.

You Need Confidence To Love Yourself

Watch Marisa’s YouTube video on how you need self-esteem in order to lead a fulfilling life:

Having high confidence and self-esteem really does help me in the everyday quest to apply self care ideas. I have built up my self-belief as I’ve got older, but what has really helped me recently is listening to Marisa’s words and reading her book, I Am Enough.

Marisa has created the following hypnosis audio downloads for developing self-esteem and self-love:

Marisa has created the following hypnosis audio downloads for developing self-esteem and self-love:

Confidence And Self-Esteem

This motivating hypnosis audio shows you how to naturally generate high self-esteem and inner confidence that radiates out from within.

Lovability

Many of us have an issue with low self-worth that goes back to thinking that we’re not lovable. This hypnosis recording helps you not just to know you’re loveable, but to feel it to such an extent that other people will sense it too.

Share this article if you have enjoyed reading it with your family and friends. 

With spring in the air, now is the time to declutter your life with a spring clean. I had been thinking for well over a year that I need to have a good clear out, but I found the idea somehow daunting and lacked the energy or motivation. However, with Marie Kondo’s inspiration, some of the Marisa Peer team decided to try it out. I feel an excited energy of anticipation to go through the experience and see what happens…

Here are 12 observations from incorporating the KonMari Method into everyday life, including the realities of the challenge to declutter your life, from my own personal perspective.

What is the KonMari Method?

According to Marie Kondo, the KonMari Method involves “tidying up in a way that will spark joy in your life and change it forever.” It is considered by many to be the ultimate method to declutter your life and appreciate everything you own.

“When you wear and surround yourself with the things you love, your house becomes your own personal paradise.”

“Tidying up is far more than deciding what to keep and what to discard. Rather it’s a priceless opportunity for learning, one that allows you to reassess and fine-tune your relationship with your possessions and to create the lifestyle

that brings you the most joy,” states Marie Kondo in ‘Spark Joy’.

A summary of the KonMari Method:

You are encouraged to sort through you items in the following order:

1. Clothes

2. Books

3. Paper

4. Kimono – miscellaneous

The process involves completing each category in its entirety. For example, piling up every item of clothing you have in one place. You then go through each item, one by one, asking: does it spark joy and do I want to take this into my future? If the answer is yes then you lovingly fold it and if the answer is no, then it is time to thank the item and let it go.

Kondo’s advice is that “sometimes the lack of that spark represents our own inner voice. This shows how deep the bond is between us and our possessions.”

Feng Shui Principles:

Having lived in China and written about ancient Eastern wisdom traditions, I was pleased to find that Marie Kondo’s method aligned with the principles of Feng Shui.

Feng Shui is the ancient Chinese practice of arranging your environment so that energy flows. Feng Shui is based on the concept that everything in your

environment has a life force or energy called Chi. When Chi energy is stagnant, it is thought to create blocks in other areas of your life, such as health, relationships and finances. It is believed that decluttering can increase the life force energy of your home and invite change into your life.

It’s a law of physics that nature will fill a vacuum or empty space. In order to allow new energy to flow into our lives, we first have to create space for it by releasing physical and emotional clutter. Letting go of the old, opens up space for the new.

A personal account – putting all of this to the test…

Why?

My husband is a firm believer in the saying ‘tidy home, tidy mind.’ I have to admit, I’m much more of a “creative free spirit” (that’s how I like to term it.) I’m very sentimental and love being surrounded by things that remind me of experiences, adventures and happy memories. However, my husband likes “clean lines” and everything put away in its place. As they say, opposites attract and we try to find the happy balance between our two preferences. Living with a small child in a small house has encouraged us to try to figure out storage solutions, but maybe it’s time to clear out the clutter and only keep the things that “spark joy?”

Marie Kondo says “tidying up means confronting yourself” and “we can only transform our lives if we sincerely want to.”

Having trained as a certified practitioner of Marisa Peer’s Rapid Transformational Therapy, I am a firm believer in the power of clearing our mind of that which no longer serves us, so why not try it in my home too?

Could decluttering our home be as life changing as decluttering our mind? Time to find out, let the process begin…

Observation 1 – Preparation or procrastination?

Having watched the Netflix program, read her book, blog, and seeing all the positive case studies, I was ready to put Marie Kondo’s method to the test and find out if tidying really could spark joy in my life and change it forever. I’m excited to release old stagnant energy

and things that may be clogging up my life and wardrobe, that no longer serve me or bring me joy. I’ve done everything I can to prepare. However…

It’s the morning I’m scheduled to start, but it feels like such a mammoth task, such a mountain to climb and conquer. I feel a little fear, nervousness and trepidation at the idea of throwing away all my things. I’ve even got sweaty palms. I notice the physical reaction I’m having to my thoughts at throwing away my beloved possessions and realise how attached I must be. “Every thought creates a physical reaction” – Marisa Peer’s words ring through my mind and I experience how true it is first hand (albeit a sweaty-palmed one.)

Observation 2: Start with the end in mind – picture your ideal future.

Marie Kondo suggests we start by imagining our ideal lifestyle – how we want to live once we’ve finished. Imagine, draw, write or vision board your ideal home and life.

I imagine how good it will feel to have

cleared through all my clutter and only keep the things that spark joy. I imagine the space this will create in my life and my wardrobe for the new and improved. I look forward to inviting new energy into my life.

As reluctant as I may be feeling to release old sentimental items, I tell myself that it is better they go to a new home and are loved and enjoyed anew, rather than sit stagnant in situ and stale energy. The life force energy of Chi needs to flow, to move, to live. This is why the practise of Tai Chi is so beneficial for the body, as it gets the energy flowing in harmony through gentle flowing movements.

There’s nothing left for it. I’ve got my tea, my water and some lovely organic dates to keep my blood sugar up (I’ve found these work as a great substitution for chocolate, as they give you that juicy natural sugar hit, yet are also good for you.)

Observation 3: You have to create the mountain before you can conquer it.

My initial instinct was to approach my spring clean the way I do any daunting task that threatens to be overwhelming, by breaking it down into manageable chunks and taking it step by step. However the first task of the KonMari Method is very clear on how to

declutter your life. You have to pile up ALL your clothes in one go. Kondo says “do not skip this part it is very important.”

The pile begins… after emptying just one wardrobe I’m completely worn out. The pile is already to the top of the sofa bed. I need a lie down. I don’t think it’s going to be possible to do all my clothes. I’m not sure I’m going to be able to cope with the chaos. I’m very, very tempted to give up and just to do this pile before emptying anything else. Then I think back to Marie Kondo saying how important it is to do ALL of it in one go. I decide to go with it, to try it and see. I’m kind of curious (and a bit terrified) to see the sheer volume of all my clothes. My nose is going crazy with dust as I bring out old piles of clothes, which haven’t been touched since my last clear out. Whoops.

The feeling seeing ALL my clothes piled up is a mix of hilarity, embarrassment and triumph. How have I got so many clothes, yet nothing to wear? There are things I’d forgotten about at the bottom of the pile and am pleased to see some old faithful friends again.

Observation 4: the reality is never as bad as the anticipation.

As I get started I realise it actually isn’t too bad. I spot a few things instantly that I thank and pass on for a new home. Then I have some jackets, virtually brand new, which I love but haven’t worn all winter. I have a practical raincoat by the front door that tends to be what I grab without even thinking. I guess it relates back to how we operate from our subconscious 95% of the time, running on autopilot. Time for a new home, for someone else to wear and enjoy. It’s no good just sat in a wardrobe unworn.

As I progress I’m feeling much better. I make little piles of all different category items and feel a sense of calm as I sort everything. I work in little bursts with breaks in between. It may take me days, or even the rest of my life, but it will get done and sorted, which is somehow a comforting thought that takes any pressure away from it.

Observation 5: Occasional and seasonal clothes.

I seperate the summer clothes and winter clothes and I thank every item on the pile for a new home, which is growing. I decide there are some things I’m not sure about, so I create another pile to take more time considering or try on later as Kondo suggests. With so

many different seasons to contend with in the UK, we really do need a lot more clothes and layers for all eventualities (I justify to myself.)

A challenge I face is what to do about occasional seasonal clothes? For example, I have holiday clothes, like beachwear and kimonos that are perfect for lounging around a pool, but not everyday wear and certainly not suitable for our cold winters, so haven’t been worn in a while.

After some consideration, I decide a good storage solution for holiday clothes is to pack them in my empty holiday suitcase. The suitcase is taking up space regardless, so it might as well also have clothes in it. As an added bonus, if I suddenly got invited on a holiday of a lifetime, I’d be all packed and ready to go at the drop of a hat (although not any of my hats – as they are now all packed away!)

Observation 6: What about when it sparks joy, but is not part of my future?

When I got to my recent bridesmaid dress I froze, unsure of what to do? Does it spark joy? Yes absolutely, very happy memories. Is it part of my future? Probably not. As beautiful as it is, I cannot imagine an opportunity to wear it again. So what do I do?

I believe Kondo says it’s OK to keep things of sentimental value as long as they are appreciated. She has some great ideas for repurposing special items in new ways, such as decorations. I’ve kept two items I love the fabric of to make cushions or a bag with. I decided that for now I will carefully put my bridesmaid dress in the loft with my other wedding and special occasion dresses. Sorry if that’s cheating, some things I just cannot discard, even if they serve no practical purpose in the future. I think to myself that I’m sure Marie Kondo wouldn’t mind, she seems so lovely and understanding. I will get to experience the joy of seeing these dresses again in the future and perhaps my daughter will even get joy from dressing up in my wedding dress one day.

Observation 7: I think I may have a problem!

Clothes are my biggest category and in particular, floral frocks are my weakness. I love beautiful bold colourful dresses, they spark a lot of joy and I would like to see them in my future. However they are not particularly practical. I tend to pull on the same old clothes for school runs and play dates, which pretty much seems to be the extent of my ‘occasions’ these days. However, as we spring into spring, I may just start to wear my dresses for no reason other than I love them. I make a pact with myself that I will wear my dresses more often and for no special occasion, just because they spark joy (and they have to earn their place taking up valuable wardrobe space.) I look at all the colours and patterns and feel pleased with how much colour I have in my life and wardrobe.

Back when I worked in the corporate world, I used to have a very black wardrobe. I always remember someone (from ‘the outside’) once commenting in a business meeting that it looked like we were all going to a funeral! After I had my daughter for the first few months I also lived in identical black yoga pants and black cotton tops, as I didn’t have the brain power to choose clothes. I was in sleep-deprived survival mode, where I was living more like a milking, nappy changing machine, rather than my former flowery frocked self. However if it brings happiness to life then it can’t be bad.

I’ve found that even when you feel awful, if you put on bright, happy colourful clothes, people think this reflects how you feel. I’ve discovered that if you want people to think you’ve got more energy than you have, put on bright energising clothes and this will create the illusion of vibrant vitality! It may also make you feel better too…

Observation 8: Dress for success: how does your ideal future look and feel?

We know that our physiology can change how we feel (I like Amy Cuddy’s TED talk: ‘your body language may shape who you are’.) Like music and power poses, I also believe that clothes can change how we feel and the energy that surrounds us. We’ve all heard the expression ‘dress for success’ and the job/role/future you want.

It has been stated that 93% of people’s impression of credibility is non verbal. Therefore what we present to the world visually, including the clothes we wear, can hugely influence how a message is received or perceived. For example, when I gave my TEDx talk on what makes you happy, I chose to wear a ‘happy’ dress – a bright bold colourful print to reflect the subject matter.

How we dress not only influences how we feel, but also other people’s perceptions. Research proves that we associate white coats with a knowledgeable doctor or scientist – someone you can trust with your life! We are more likely to follow instructions given to us by someone wearing a white coat, even if it goes against our own judgement. This is because our mind likes shortcuts and we know how powerful our subconscious mind can be, outside of our conscious control. As Marisa teaches, our mind is always listening and watching what we tell it – our job is to give it clear instructions on what we want and how we would like to feel. It’s like programming the desired destination into GPS, if you don’t know where you want to go, it makes it much harder to get there!

I like Marie Kondo’s principle that you should start the process by visualising your ideal future, how you would like your home, life and self to be. This then gives you a benchmark to check against when you ask ‘do I want to bring this into my future?’ Gaining crystal clarity on what you want is also a powerful technique used in Marisa’s Rapid Transformational Therapy. The classic question is: If you had a magic wand what would you want? Knowing what you want is the first step to achieving it.

Observation 9: Books.

Once I had conquered clothes, following the KonMari Method, I was onto books. As an author I love books and dream of one day having a library of books in my office. I therefore thought I’d find it much harder than it actually was to let go of old books. I kept my favourite fiction and realised I had quite a few books I’d yet to read, which is a bonus. I kept my reference library of relevant non-fiction books as these are very useful and often consulted. However I felt an unexpected

ease of passing on other books I’d already read and didn’t plan to read again. Books are there to be read not hoarded gathering dust. I felt a sense of satisfaction seeing my new tidy bookshelves all categorised and easily accessible. It did feel like everything was starting to make sense, neatly filed away for future reference – hopefully in my mind too.

Observation 10: Paperwork.

I had a box full of my paperwork to sift through and a mountainous pile of my daughter’s delightful artwork to sort. Thanks to my parents-in-law we had a brilliant new idea for some of the best artwork. We laminate the pictures and use these as placemats for the dinner table. It’s a wonderful colourful way to enjoy the art. We also laminated pictures to decorate the kitchen, creating a colourful art gallery on display.  I value Marie Kondo’s point that it’s much better to have things out on display and appreciated, than tucked away unseen, unvalued and unloved.

Observation 11: Kimono – miscellaneous.

We have a few of these little pockets of miscellaneous draws and cupboards full of everything and anything. In our old London home I used to call one of these spaces ‘Bob’s draw’ as it housed all the bits and bobs that didn’t otherwise have a home. When we moved we tried to re-home things, such as getting an actual tool box, which was proper grown up behaviour! However, I still do struggle to know where is the best place for light bulbs and the such?

As painful as it was to pull all the junk out and try to categorise what we wanted to keep, once it was done it felt refreshing. I loved the new arts and craft box my daughter and I made, with little compartments for bits and pieces. I was amazed how much stuff we got rid of and how much better it was to be able to see everything organised and easily accessible.

Observation 12: Clarity succeeds chaos.

Whilst the process did feel a little chaotic, getting everything out on the table (literally!), it was a very cleansing experience and I loved the end result. I felt much calmer with a clarity that came from having everything tidy and in order. I felt a new lightness, although I still don’t feel fully finished. However, Marie Kondo says that once you’ve gone through her method it stays with you for life. I can believe that. This is a lifetime process, not just a one-off. I find myself looking at things differently, I see things clearer and am a lot less sentimental now that I have the powerful questions to ask: does it spark joy and does it belong in my future?

So can a spring clean really spark joy and transform your life?

I would recommend having a good spring clean to everyone and am interested to hear how others found it. I can see how the process would be enhanced with expert guidance and trained consultants. It’s not just tidying up, it’s getting your life and mind in order and yes, I believe that really can be life changing.

I’ve found this spring clean a great practise to let go of that which no longer serves and is not aligned to the energy of the future. By clearing the clutter, we focus on what we want and attract new energy into our lives.

Marie Kondo states “success depends 90 percent on your mindset,” which is exactly the reason why Marisa’s Rapid Transformational Therapy is so phenomenally powerful. Marie Kondo’s method declutters our house, whilst Marisa’s RTT method declutters our mind. Ultimately this is an empowering and transformative process to declutter your life.